It's been a rough and tumble type of day and all your thoughts tend to lead you into Temptation's unkind hand showing you how to loathe yourself by lathering on negative self talk and unhealthy habits that only create a thriving environment for more self-loathing, which chips away at and inevitably buries the strength you must have to blossom in such an unforgiving world with endless demands on your heart and mind and physical body, until you begin to truly want to give up on your dreams and stop caring so deeply about people who continually spurn what you have to give--what you give so freely and beautifully--as you continue on your journey toward eternity, which appears to be completely out of reach and maybe not for you, no, because maybe you don't deserve to be happy or loved or appreciated or make any measurable difference in this brutal existence since whichever direction you turn there continues to be disheartening and terribly disenchanting dead ends, but then--you reach out one more time with a quiet, pleading heart and someone is able to read your humanity right and care enough to reach out in return even though it might be a risk to take as well to show pure loving understanding, and a treasure is unearthed: friendship in its perfect form.
So glad you were able to hang in there...sometimes all one can so is take the next step...hope writing helps you spiral out of this too. Sending a prayer for better times.
ReplyDelete