thinking too much

Believe it or not, I didn't realize that I'd forgotten to write a slice of life until 5 days ago. I've been writing slices for about three years now, and I forgot two weeks in a row! 

That tidbit just tells you how challenging this period of time has been for me. Many hobbies and habits that typically cause happiness have had to go into storage for now. I wonder if I'll pick some of the stuff back up once the smoke clears. However, I do know that writing will never go away by choice. 

Thinking about change, my life is changing so rapidly that I wouldn't know one way or the other how things are going to be in a year from now—not even in six months. When I can capture a snippet of quiet, I wonder at how far I've come and how much further I have to go and what my journey will end up looking like. I wonder in the moment sometimes whether I am making the best use of my opportunities. I contemplate why no one wants to commit to me. I wonder why I reject (albeit kindly) so many men. I set my sights on the future and make plans, but I'd really like to know if I'll ever have someone by my side who cares for the real me and wants to share our lives permanently. It's such a mystery. 

I can't think of any of that for another minute. It's too much. 

I intend to get back on the slice of life wagon. The encouragement that I receive during this current adventure is reason enough to remember. I need encouragement like a fish needs water.