If you know me at all, you've maybe heard (or read) me allude to one of my favorite movies' quotes from Dan In Real Life to the point of exhaustion, yet as I contemplate the past school year, I cannot help but think of it again:
I want to talk to you about the subject of plans…life plans and how we all make them, and how we hope that our kids make good, smart, safe plans of their own. But if we’re really honest with ourselves, most of our plans don’t work out as we’d hoped. So instead of asking our young people, "What are your plans? What do you plan to do with your life?", maybe we should tell them this: Plan…to be surprised.
When I ended last school year, I had very different plans for the summer and the following school year, this school year. Then, life happened like it always does. And things changed dramatically in more ways than one.
Three major plan changers occurred. I got injured and couldn't do much of anything for months without pain and suffering. I decided I needed to keep teaching instead of going into a master degree program. I for sure fell for a guy.
The injury is something I can't really go into due to legal issues, but suffice it to say, we didn't have the best summer. It was actually quite the opposite. And then this whole school year has been fraught with struggles and surgeries. All of my vacations have been used to rest and recover in varying degrees. I think I'm just about out of that tunnel, but man alive, it has overshadowed the entire past year.
To keep teaching was a big gamble. Changing goals like that when I hadn't found a placement anywhere, let alone at my school I've been at since graduation, was risky stuff. I was applying for teaching and editing jobs and interviewing like crazy for anything that fit in those two boxes. But then, my school's assistant administrator called me into school to propose a job offer. The contract wasn't big, but the shorter work hours felt like a godsend (Remember, I was in major pain at the time while trying to secure employment.). I just had a feeling I needed to keep things light. And so, I switched jobs again while staying at my same school. That was the happiest surprise I've had since becoming a teacher. I love where I work, so I was really torn about going back to school or working somewhere else. It just feels like a type of home—if work can feel like a home. I must be an official grown up to say something like that.
And about falling for a guy. Well, I did. It kept sneaking up on me little by little over the past several months, but the summertime cracked my heart open to the possibility of letting myself love someone again. I'm going to get a little non-teacherly on you, but I've been dating all sorts since the divorce. Old boyfriends, friends from high school, strangers I met at singles dances, an emotional relationship with someone out of state, and shoot, I even dated a sales guy who was picking up on me at the car dealership. I actually count him as my first stranger (person I didn't know from before I got married and divorced) date. In case you're wondering, we texted awhile and went out twice. It was fun, but I was so not ready at all! I even have had a creep experience that scared me. But back to my point, I have dated around, but I never was able to let anyone totally in for various reasons. And then this guy made his way into my heart. It's been wonderful to spend time building a good and happy friendship and work through issues together. The level of respect and kindness between us means so much to me. He even went to a school play with me. I don't know about you, but I think that's a pretty big deal if someone will do that who isn't even related to the actors or employed by the school. I do love the productions they put on, like it's honestly good, but still. It's a school play. As we head into summer, I am unsure if this is going any further, but I hope it does keep on keeping on.
Slowing down from the injuries and taking a part-time position were both big steps and changed me so much. Nevertheless, to care for someone and be cared about has made the most impact this school year. A real perspective shift. I don't think I could have planned for such big surprises. So what I suggest is to fine tune the saying;
preparing to be surprised is more what I believe in. Keep doing things. Keep setting goals. Keep learning and growing. But in all of that, be sure you know surprises will come and have all you do positioning you to be ready for the surprises. I think that's how I was able to make it through this school year truly. I have been preparing and preparing so much for things not even in my sights, yet here I am finishing up a most excellent year because while I was very surprised, I can now see clearly how I was prepared and even ready for it all.
