As I write this, I have heartburn that could ruin an entire national forest if I unleashed it, and I feel like there's a ton of bricks on my eyelids wanting me to sleep for days. I have a heavy heart that I've allowed to continue, and I just don't know what to do about all the things that are pushing on my time right now.
Learning a new job while wrapping up the old one is a feat all its own without having someone around to help out. Plus, there are about ten other things going on that cannot be delayed. And I am realizing how no task is a simple task when you have the aforementioned circumstances. For instance, I decided to take my study and transform it into an office, which means getting the old desks out and rearranging things to suit only my needs. Before, it was designed for homework doing with kids, and I didn't have a focus on what I needed other than that. My resources I had in shelves nearby were for homework, not my post-graduation life. The whole place needed a nice little overhaul.
So wanting and actually needing a more inspiring workspace has been overdue, and it is taking so much time. So very much.
One good thing about this black hole I've fallen into is how I'm realizing how things will be alright. It might sound strange, but my purse collection actually reminded me to keep looking on the bright side. As I picked up an old purse off the hooks I'm repurposing, I got the idea to actually use the purse for my repurposing plan, and it is turning out to be truly functional and fun all at once. I have rediscovered some of my resources that I had only seen as good for school, and I found a few treasures that were tucked in little baskets and such from my old system. I found an unmailed letter from two years ago too that I thank heaven I found and not my children after I die. If for nothing else, I'm glad I am redoing this room, so I don't have to deal with a posthumous shaming. I am such an emotional writer sometimes. Good grief.
I don't even know if this slice of life makes any sense. I'm still ablaze with heartburn and I feel horribly exhausted. But maybe, just maybe, you can see how I might complain but I love my life and creating systems to be effective. What a dorky nerd weirdo I am. Seriously.
Have a good week, everyone!