humility

So much happened and changed last year that I realize I began being humbled early on. It was too noticeable to avoid actually, but I'll add that it has been a good thing (now that I have a little distance from all the trauma). However, as we got closer to the new year, I had a feeling I needed to wrap my heart around humility further. I kept thinking about the happy side effects of cultivating a more humble attitude and outlook, the calm it brought to my life—after first feeling hurled down a terrifying roller coaster one cannot get off.

Another, very random thought I had when selecting this word was how dull humility sounds as I read about other people's ideas for their one little word/word of the year. So many people I know have action words and fun words and interesting ideas for how to sew their words into their lives. My word is not any of that. It is one of waiting for opportunities to do slow down and listen and pondering the aftermath of my choices and watching for my heart to turn into something new. Putting it that way, I now feel a morsel of excitement. This feels special in a way. I do so want to become a more understanding and loving person, and I believe more humility within myself will help this.

Humility might not be enticing or even exciting in itself, but I'm pretty sure it's what I need to learn and cultivate further in order to have more joy in my life. I hope you'll join me in my journey with this word for 2019.

public shaming

A couple of years ago, I was part of a discussion involving public shaming. Long story short, it involved a special education teacher blowing off some steam because her students had been mistreated while on a field trip. There were numerous enraged responses to the story. People calling the mom and her children horrible names and hoping that the post would make its way around, and she'd end up seeing it and feel embarrassed for her actions.

What no one is remembering is that this snapshot of a parent (regardless of their actions) was taken without their consent and many people are judging actions they did not witness.

Here's a hypothetical: What if they were simply having a terrible day and that's why they were out at the venue, and the mom was having a horrible lapse in judgment? It is no excuse, but objectifying people and publicly shaming has become acceptable somehow, yet it opens the door to becoming what you abhor: a bully.

Am I the only person questioning this method of intolerance? I don't see how public shaming isn't simply another form of mistreatment, which I typically label as bullying. 

Another big issue is that the post was probably not the most effective nor professional method of educating the public about SpecEd. I believe advocating for the student on site would have been the more effective approach and least potentially legally damaging. When out with my own special needs daughter I deal with people directly when there have been public insensitivity incidents. It can get infuriating, but the main point is to educate and hold people accountable in a proper way, so they can learn from the situation.

I'd like to know what you think could be some alternate solutions to such incidents. 

2019 better be good

I know and know of too many people who say 2018 was a rough year to think I'm special. It was chock-full of change, both hard and happy, but so much, too much. I don't necessarily long for status quo, but man alive it would be nice to have a chance to breathe for a bit.

Resolutions are not my thing, but I do love to work on improving myself regularly. So this year, I'm looking toward the future with an expectation of garbage loads of change and working on my perspective toward it. I want to take it in stride instead of crying or getting resentful. I want to see how far I can go without giving in to negativity.

One thing I also hope for in this year we have in front of us is for my family to grow in love. I am very hopeful for this year to be the one where we have so much positivity and love that we never doubt that we care for one another. I want to have so much love and kindness that other people can see how much we love each other.

I have high hopes for this new year, 2019. Don't let a lady down. 

baby, it's cold

There are two songs claiming to be Christmas songs that I detest. One of them is "Baby, It's Cold Outside" and the other we shall save for another Christmastime rant. I never liked that song even before all the controversial analyzation of it. There are people weighing in all over the place, so I can't stop thinking about it. Maybe if I write about it, I can set it on the shelf and forget about a song that has always grated on my nerves.

I've read a couple of articles bashing it and a couple of articles defending it by means of the cultural context of the sayings that are being railed against. None of the articles, however, address the issue with it not being a Christmas song in the least.

As soon as I could understand the words, I was like, Huh? How does messing around and pretending to be or actually becoming incoherently inebriated have anything to do with Christmas? Seriously, I don't get it. Maybe people do those things extra around Christmas? But the thing is it is not about Christmas.

The meaning of Christmas is about the celebration of Christ's birth and the many good things he exemplified in his life, so we can make our feeble attempts to be more like Him. To me, that's the essence of Christmas. Many people who aren't Christian even participate because of the goodwill and kindness that it provokes within our communities. Then some people might pose the flimsy argument about the pagan origins of some traditions, etc., but that's not what any Christian has celebrated at Christmastime in two or three hundred years. If what I do to celebrate Christ were meant for pagan motivations, I would stop doing them. So don't even start with me. My intent at Christmastime is entirely focused on showing love for my fellow man and to honor my God and His Son with more fervor.

Yes, the song about being cold outside, but that doesn't make it about Christmas. If we're going to cut to the chase, "Baby, It's Cold Outside" is more like a song about two people giving in to temptation and making excuses for their behavior and blaming the weather instead of being honest about feelings or circumstances. All I can hope is that I don't have to switch the radio station as often because it's not coming on anymore.

top 25 books that changed my life

1. Frankenstein
2. Jane Eyre
3. HBR's 10 Must Reads on Leadership
4. The Souls of Black Folk
5. Night
6. Peter Pan
7. The Good Earth
8. The House of the Seven Gables
9. The Scarlet Letter
10. Lord of the Flies
11. The Things They Carried
12. The Wednesday Wars
13. Tuesdays with Morrie
14. O Pioneers!
15. Farenheit 451
16. The Last Book in the Universe
17. Anne of Green Gables Series 
18. The Hatchet Series
19. The Twilight Series
20. The Chronicles of Narnia
21. Norton Anthology of English Literature: Romantic Period
22. The Lord of the Rings 
23. Blackmoore
24. Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl
25. The Chicago Manual of Style

*In random order and a series DOES count as one entry because I make the rules.