As I sit eating dinner and talking with new friends, I am struck by the juxtaposition of sheer happiness and awkwardness surrounding me. Both sensations push upon me, appearing to be contradictory in nature. Although how I am seeing things, the end result could go any which way.
We always have a choice to give into the awkward discomfort of meeting new people by running away (mentally or physically). Or we can seek to embrace the exhilaration that comes when new friendship is forged. Yet, the choice is clear for me. I believe the exhilaration of friendship's beginning would not come without that ingredient of newness present and the suffering of awkwardness is part of the bargain.
Even though I enjoy making new friends, I must admit I experience that I-feel-almost-nauseous-so-maybe-I-should-leave nervousness like other people. I like to ignore it. What I do, instead of running away, is start talking. And then it's all over from there.
People either love me.
Grow to love me.
Or seriously hate my guts.
I think I am an acquired taste (see Uniquely Amazing for more commentary).
We always have a choice to give into the awkward discomfort of meeting new people by running away (mentally or physically). Or we can seek to embrace the exhilaration that comes when new friendship is forged. Yet, the choice is clear for me. I believe the exhilaration of friendship's beginning would not come without that ingredient of newness present and the suffering of awkwardness is part of the bargain.
Even though I enjoy making new friends, I must admit I experience that I-feel-almost-nauseous-so-maybe-I-should-leave nervousness like other people. I like to ignore it. What I do, instead of running away, is start talking. And then it's all over from there.
People either love me.
Grow to love me.
Or seriously hate my guts.
I think I am an acquired taste (see Uniquely Amazing for more commentary).
Your last line made me laugh. Very cute.
ReplyDeleteRuth
It's so true... meeting new people is is a journey, not always a fun journey but none the less a journey which we can always continue or turn around and go home...I say, do what ever feels right at the time! And can I say I love the music as I read your slices!
ReplyDeleteNothing is wrong with being an acquired taste. You are a delicacy!
ReplyDeleteAcquired tastes are the best kind
ReplyDeleteI feel exactly the same way. In years past, I was so uncomfortable talking to people I barely knew and I hated small talk. But as you put it, the suffering and awkwardness is part of the bargain. Today, I love meeting new people, and often talk to strangers in stores, waiting in line, etc. I think I've simply outgrown the awkwardness or I just don't let it phase me that much.
ReplyDelete