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This Phoenix Speaks

Seven years in the making, my first published book, This Phoenix Speaks , is now a reality. The tireless and tiring work invested to ma...


Some people have it. Some people do not. But then there are people who have it sometimes and then not at other times. Most days, I am the confident type. The reason I say most days is because I am human, although I used to have so much confidence it was to a fault. Being overly confident in situations when you should have some reservations can be detrimental to relationships and future levels of confidence. I know this thing.

So anyways. I just wanted to say how NOT confident I am feeling today. I stand on the precipice of change and am ready to jump (I am actually most decidedly in the midst of an outright free fall), yet I do not know where I will land. Landing on my feet is something I expect, but how much more brokenness will I suffer in the process? When all you can think about is how much you need to be held, I think we can safely say confidence levels are significantly waning.

One thing that heartens me is that I have been given innumerable blessings to soften life's blows. Unexpected friendships--new and renewed--are my most valuable commodity at the moment. If I did not receive what I do from friends, I would not be able to keep going, temporally or emotionally. I am lifted and blessed by the gift of friendship on a daily basis without any exaggeration. I borrow from friends the confidence I lack until I realize what I should have seen in the first place. 

I am feeling low. Yet, I know things will work out somehow. We'll wait and see how it all pans out together.

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