lumpy bumpy

The morning was easy going and peaceful. I had gone to sleep content; having all of my children under one roof always helps me sleep easier. So I was having a really great morning. My oldest son was up and showering, so I didn't need to worry about waking him to get to the train in time for him to head back to his place. I was up and rested and getting myself ready for work, and my oldest daughter's home health aide arrived on time to help get her ready for the day. Everything was moving like clockwork.

But then, in the midst of my peaceful morning, her aide called me to come in, and she said she found an armpit lump on my daughter.

I felt it, and then did a parallel check on both to see if it was her body. And it was not just her body. It is a lump. A hard pea-sized or bigger lump.

As soon as the doctor's office opened, I called. The nurse had to call me back. And we have an appointment for the next day. That is all good and proactive. But I have a sick feeling in my stomach from fretting. I'm trying to find a way to stop fretting. It's not like it does any good. I'm just making myself sick.

So maybe you're wondering why I have a picture of pie on display. It's because when I decided to write about this and distract myself, the first thing I thought about was how happy my daughter was to make pie on Pi Day.

Coconut cream pudding pie is simple. I got all the ingredients after school that day, so she could make a pie with her helper who was coming over for the evening. I know how much she likes to "cook" stuff, so it was going to be a great time.

As predicted, she and her helper had so much fun making her pudding pie. She was so proud of herself that she was being a showoff about it. It always makes me smile to see her trying to make sure everyone sees her good work.

And now, I'm thinking about how she has little lumps and bumps on her head and other places, and maybe, it won't be a big deal. But the fact is it could be a big deal, but I will work hard to breathe and not worry.